The past week:
On Wednesday, we learned of some heartbreaking things happening in our family.
On Thursday, I heard of a serious situation in the life of a young person who is like family to me.
On Saturday, at four o'clock in the morning, I was driving a family member to the emergency room.
On Tuesday, we got the news that a long-time family friend had suddenly died.
And that a family member's brother had died.
All of this...in just one week.
It's a lot.
Last summer and into the Fall, we got news of a death among our family and friends at least once a week. In the space of six weeks, six women that I know lost their husbands.
This constant news of death is heart-breaking and heavy.
Also...we're not unusual.
If you're feeling weary...you're not alone. People speak of "compassion fatigue." There must also be such a thing as...tragedy fatigue. For many of us, these past two years have been a nearly non-stop stream of tragedy and heartbreak.
News of a trauma or death is like taking a body blow. It hits, and leaves a mark. Some blows are lighter, while others bruise deeply. Over time, we heal from such blows. These past two years have been like being stuck in the ring with the world heavyweight boxing champ, in a bout where the bell never rings. For many of us, the blows just keep coming, with little chance to catch our breath, let alone heal.
It is taking a toll. We are weary and sad and our hearts are very sore.
At the same time...this is the marrow of life; standing in the hard places with one another.
In the wake of our son's death three and a half years ago, people were lovingly careful of me. They did not come to me with sadness or hard news. I was deeply grateful for their thoughtfulness. I was carrying all I could carry. While I am still, always, devastated by our own loss, it is good to see that I have healed enough to walk with others in their pain. I am glad I wasn't sheltered from the news of pain and hard concern in the lives of people I love. I am glad to once again be someone a friend can come to, with a heavy heart, asking for prayer. It tells me that I am, in fact, healing.
If you are exhausted from the endless stream of bad news, you are, sadly, not alone.
Also- good news! You are not alone! My friend, you are not alone.
We can either plod along in a stunned parade, staring blankly at our own inner wastelands, or we can put our arms around each other and walk together. I think of soldiers from some old-time war, making their way back from the Front. I picture one guy wounded in the leg, while the other has an arm in a sling and a bandage over his eyes. The one guy puts his arm around the shoulders of his friend, to take the weight from his injured leg. In return, he acts as the "eyes" for his friend, so he doesn't run into obstacles.They could each struggle along alone, but instead they make that trek together.
Our "wounds," and the heavy loads we carry may be different, but we can help each other along. We can, at the very least, help each other to feel less alone. When we're able, we can put a shoulder under the burden of our friend and help bear the weight for a while.
Sometimes, all we can carry is our own suffering.
Sometimes, we are able to help carry the suffering of another.
Always, it is good to remember that we are not alone.
We are not alone in our suffering and in our care for the suffering of others.
If you are in a hard and heavy place today, and feeling alone, may I just say...I see you there.
My heart goes out to you, with all that you are carrying.
I see you.
And I pray that the peace of God will gently gather you up and carry you.
I pray that you will feel his loving comfort, so tender with our wounded places.
I pray that you will know that you are seen and loved, and that you are not alone.
